A Better Haircut

I was working in the circus
With my boyfriend
I was flipping from a high trapeze
I'd fly off and he'd always catch me
Everything was going perfect in the circus
Until the day he dropped me
And then dropped me for the tattooed lady
She broke her leg in seven places!
I did
Watch the tattooed lady take her place!
And lost my job, lost my place!
'Til at last I bought this cafe!
And it seems that every single guy that I know
Has another lady on the side show!

You know our girl's a fragile egg
Don't you break her heart!
Or break her legs!
Don't you
I met a plumber on the Metro
With a tool belt
He was kinda bald but good in bed
And fixed my leaky radiator.

So we go out on a few dates
Then it's too late
When you try to leave.

The jealously and crazy stalking all come later
Don't you treat her like a tape recorder
She's not a waitress who will take your order
Bring your food
Fill your refills.

Except when working at the Windmills
It seems that every single guy that strolls by
Doesn't stop till he controls my
Every thought, every move.

Are you just the same
Can you prove
That you
You
Are a lover for the ages
Can you prove that you.

Are not highly contagious
Oh yes
Love is just another diagnosis
Like bacterial vaginosis
Once you're in it, you're committed.

To everything that you've transmitted!
If you're going to be the guy to date her
Give her space and don't suffocate her
You might make 'em stop and stare
But you could use a better haircut.

Love is just another diagnosis
Like chicken pox, swine flu, streptococcus
Walking Pneumonia, mumps, herpes, hepatitis
Syphilis, tetanus, human papillomavirus
But the Mother of all diseases
[?]That brings the mightiest to their knees is
Love, love, love!

You
Might be a lover
For the ages!
But can you prove that you!
Are not highly contagious.

There's no promises that I can give you
There's no guarantee we will live to 80
Without breaking up or making each other miserable
But you know I think she understands me
I don't know why she would I understand
She may not even feel the same
I love her
And I don't know her name.

Here's her number
And address
Amélie Poulain
She's probably waiting for you at her home
There you go
All good now
Enjoy.

All the while, while love infects us
The side effect is that love connects us
All through now
There you go
Woah!
Yeah!