Bad Bad News

If I live to be twenty, I'll never understand women!
What is a man
When he gives up his soul
For a lick
From a chick
Who completely takes control?
Tell the tale.

How does a man who can see behind his head
Turn as blind as a bat with no eyes?

What is a man?
When he turns on his friends?
We've been tossed
Now we're lost
Just a platter of Burnt ends
I feel you.

How do we make
Our hero wide awake
So that he
Can re-
Alize?

That girl is bad bad news! Bad news!
Nothing but tears
Nothing but trouble
Nothing but stress!
Yes, she is bad bad news! Bad news!
Bad news!

Our buddy Brett
Is gonna regret
That he ever said yes!
The girl may be hot
But all that he's got
Is bad bad news.

What do you do when your friend's life's at stake?
Man, he's flipped
No, he's whipped
Like the cream on a cake
What can we say?
He won't talk
He won't play
How could one tongue destroy a whole team?

That girl is bad bad news! Bad news!
Oh she's very bad news
She's like a snake!
She's like a cockroach!
She's like a cow!
An evil cow
Wow, she is bad bad news! Bad news!
Très bad!

We've been abandoned
Left in the sand and
Who are we now?
He fell for a slut
With a fabulous butt
But she's bad bad news.

Perhaps there's a way we can “dispose” of her
Maybe she can “meet with an accident”?
We have got to make clear that she's not welcome here
The most horrible way we can find
We could go train a pit bull to chew on her flesh.

I don't think they attack their own kind
We could torture her mother and chop up her dog
To be honest, I don't think she'd mind!
I could rip off her pocketbook. Look, it's a start
Drive a stake through her heart, if she just had a heart
The longer it goes, the worse it'll get!
So somebody's gotta tell Brett!
YEAH!

That girl is bad, bad news! Bad news!
She took our pal.
She took our leader
And led him astray!
Hey! Hey!
She's totally bad bad news! Bad news!

Bad news!
Bad news!
Listen up, Brett!
You're not ruined yet!
We'll show you the way!
Throw her under the bus
And come back to us!

Even though she has excellent shoes...
She's bad, bad, bad, bad
bad, bad, bad, bad
News!
Bad news!