Congratulations

[Intro:]
Alexander.

[Verse 1:]
Congratulations
You have invented a new kind of stupid
A 'damage you can never undo' kind of stupid
An 'open all the cages at the zoo' kind of stupid
'Truly, you didn't think this through?' kind of stupid.

Let's review
You took a rumor a few maybe two people knew and refuted it by sharing an affair of which no one has accused you
I begged you to take a break, you refused to
So scared of what your enemies might do to you
But you're the only enemy you ever seem to lose to
You know why Jefferson can do what he wants?
He doesn't dignify schoolyard taunts with a response!

[Chorus:]
So yeah, congratulations!
You've redefined your legacy
Congratulations.

[Verse 2:]
I languished in a loveless marriage in London
I lived only to read your letters
I look at you and think 'God, what have we done with our lives and what did it get us?'
That doesn't wipe the tears or the years away
But I'm back in the city and I'm here to stay
I know what I'm here to do
I'm not here for you.

[Bridge:]
I know my sister like I know my own mind
You will never find anyone as trusting or as kind
And a million years ago, she said to me 'this one's mine'
So I stood by
Do you know why?

I love my sister more than anything in this life
I will choose her happiness over mine every time
Eliza
Is the best thing in our life
So never lose sight of the fact that you have been blessed with the best wife.

[Chorus:]
Congratulations
For the rest of your life
Every sacrifice you make is for my sister
Give her the best life.

Congratulations.