Eternal Youth Is Worth A Little Suffering

I don't think you should shoot before July 15th
Right now is a perilous time for Pisces
If you wait 'till Venus is in Capricorn
You'll avoid a catalogue of crises.

I need three more weeks to get these thighs in shape
No more carbohydrates, don't be naughty
We'll soon have you skipping like an ingenue
You won't look a day over forty
We have dry heat, we have steam
We have moisturizing cream
We have mud-packs. we have blood sacks
It's a rigorous regime.

Not a wrinkle when you twinkle
Or a wobble when you walk
Of course, there bound to be a little suffering
Eternal youth is worth a little suffering
Listen to your superego not your id
Age is just another damn neurosis
I'll have you regressing back to infancy
And back into the womb under hypnosis.

I inject the tissue of the fatal lamb
The formula's the one Somerset Maugham owns
Just a modest course of thirty-seven shots
And you will be a heaving mass of hormones.

No more crow's feet, no more flab
No more love handles to grab
You'll be so thin they'll all think you are
Walking sideways like a crab
Nothing sagging, nothing bagging
Nothing dragging on the floor
Of course, there bound to be a little suffering
Eternal youth is worth a little suffering
Of course, there bound to be a little suffering
Eternal youth is worth a little suffering
Of course, there bound to be a little suffering.