First Letter Home

Mum, I'm mad about Manhattan
I've already been out dancing!
There's so much going on here
Every day is an event.

I went out into a deli
And I had this salt beef sandwich
Well, I very nearly fainted Mum
It was the size of Kent!

I can't keep writing letters
It's so slow and so old fashioned
You have to go online, Mum
Make life easier for me.

There's no need to be frightened
And idiot can log on
You managed very well going
From vinyl to CD.
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Girls, i've got this small apartment
It's not quiet "Friends" or "Frasier"
I don't think it would cut the ice
With many New York men.

I tried to go out clubbing
But I felt like such a saddo
They say this city never sleeps
But I'm in bed by ten.

When are you coming over?
The shopping here is brilliant
I've got Jimmy Choos and Fendi
They were going for a song.

Well, I got them on Canal Street
But just like sex for one, girls
Solo retail therapy
Don't scratch the itch for long!

The latest craze for singles
Is something called Speed Dating
Twenty blokes an hour
Must be one there meant for me.

Look, I know I sound quite desperate
But it could be such a giggle
I might find Mr Right, girls
Well I might find two or three!