Secretary:
Guys, Michael Bolton is here
Andy:
Oh, great! Send him in.
Michael Bolton:
Hey guys.
Andy, Akiva & Jorma:
Hi, thanks for coming!
Michael Bolton:
Sorry i'm late. I got caught up watching the Pirates of the Carribean Marathon. Have you
seen those things?
Andy:
Oh yeah, yeah, those are, those are great.
Michael Bolton:
Well, I checked out the track and I loved it. And I wrote you this big sexy hook I think
you're really gonna dig.
Andy:
Oh wow, that's great, awesome. You wanna, just lay it down?
Michael Bolton:
Boys, let's get to it.
Andy (whispering):
Here we go.
Andy:
Uh, Lonely Island, Michael Bolton (MB: Yeah!)
[Ver1:]
The night starts now
Together on the track, the boys are back. (The night starts now)
The night starts now. Baby roll with us
Chicks snapping at the neck when we rollin' up. (MB: Rollin' up)
Blow through the doors, ain't no holdin' up (MB: Yeah)
Black card at the bar, like I give a fuck. (MB: Come on).
Ladies shifty eyed, when we walk into the set
But the fellas looking jealous, play the back and get wet (MB: Yeah yeah)
Three pound in my waist, shank in my sock
You either get cut, get stuffed or get shot.
[Chorus1:]
This is the tale of Captain Jack Sparrow.
Pirate so brave, on the seven seas (What)
A mystical quest to the isle of Tortuga
Raven locks sway.
On the ocean's breeze.
[Ver2:]
Yeah, that was kinda weird, but we're back in the club
Buying up the bar, so the groupies show us love (MB: Kiera Knightly)
Motherfucking iceman, I'm the top gunner
Heater on blast, I'm the number one stunner (MB: Jack Sparrow)
Watch it girl, cause I ain't your "Mr. nice guy",
More like the "Meet ya, take you home and fuck you twice guy." (MB: Yeah yeah!)
All dressed up, with nowhere to run
And now I make you feel crazy with
Now back to the good part!
[Chorus2:]
From the day he was born, he yearned for adventure (No)
Oh, Captain Jack
Givin' them what for
He's the pauper of the surf
The Jester of Tortuga (Oh god)
From Davy Jones' locker, what lies in store (Yeah, we've seen the movie).
Andy:
Throw your hands in the air, and say hell yeah. C'mon (MB: Captain Jack)
What? (MB: Johnny Depp)
No!
Jorma:
From the front to the back, say we count stacks, C'mon (MB: Davy Jones)
Nope. (MB: Giant Squid)
Wrong.
Akiva:
Michael Bolton, we're really gonna need you to focus up.
Michael Bolton:
Roger that, let me try it with another film.
(Andy: Wait!)
[Coda:]
Life is a box of chocolates, and my name is Forrest Gump. (Not better)
Though I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed
I give Jenny all of my love (Come on!)
Ok then, I'm a legal aide. Erin Brockovich is my name (Oh no, oh god)
Then you can call me Scarface
Snortin' mountains of cocaine. (Close enough)
You cockroaches wanna play rough? OKAY, I'm reloaded
This is the tale of Tony Montana (This is the tale)
Cubano flame, with the Miami nuts (Take it home)
Got a basehead wife
But her womb is polluted
This whole town's a pussy, just waiting to get fucked (Just waitin' to get fucked)
Andy:
Okay, turns out Michael Bolton is a major cinephile (You complete me)
Yup, yeah, okay.
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