Uptown Funk! Parody (Explicit Version)

Da, do, do, ru, do, do, ru do da!
Do, do, ru, do, do, ru do da!
Do, do, ru, do, do, ru do da!
Do, do, ru, do da!
This song is lazy it just rips off the 80's.
Back when all Funk music was made by huge cocaine addicts.
Every
Nostril
Had some white nose candy in it.
And everyone got up to use the bathroom every ten minutes.
I'm too high.
Just snort.
That guy looks like Michael Jackson.
I'm 5'5′.
That's short.
That's not a man, that's a lesbian.
Who's that guy?
Some dork.
I wrote this song! I'm Mark Ronson!
This looks like New York.
But it's just a cheap run-down movie set.
Girls walking by ignore us.
Ew!
Walk by and just ignore us.
Ew!
This song has no real chorus.
True!
It's just me and these four guys clappin'
Looking into the camera clappin'
Something cool is about to happen.
We're gonna dance while the cameraman spins the camera around.
Spin it!
Da, do, do, ru, do, do, ru do rah!
Do, do, ru, do, do, ru do rah!
Do, do, ru, do, do, ru do rah!
Do, do, ru, do, do, ru do rah!
Mark don't try to get down!
White boy dance like a clown.
Why? Because I'm not brown?
Hey don't have a meltdown!
Please let me hang around!
Okay fine just
Stop!
Come walk with me.
Just don't dance Ronson you're too shitty.
Bruno please sign this check to buy a car that's a wreck.
Which we'll dance 'round in the street without gettin' in it.
Can I please dance with you guys now?
No Mark Ronson you keep sittin'.
I'm too hot.
You're wet.
Da, do, do, ru, do, do, ru do rah!
Do, do, ru, do, do, ru rah!
Do, do, ru, do, do, ru rah!
Do, do, ru, do, do, ru rah!
The sweat's turning my pink jacket red.
Could you stop dancin'
I'm trying to shine your shoes you coke head!
Now we've got.
Up top.
Old lady hair rollers on our heads.
We look like grandmas.
And my damn nose is bloody from the blow.
I was on a computer.
Ooh!
And I read a strange rumor.
Ooh!
You're Michael Jackson Jr.!
Ooh!
So is it true was he your father?
That would be an amazing honor.
That can't be they're different colors!
Back from the dead to clear up this shit.
But first grab your own d-ck and dance!
Da, do, do, ru, do, do, ru do rah!
Do, do, ru, do, do, ru do rah!
Do, do, ru, do, do, ru do rah!
Do, do, ru, do, do, ru do rah!
One more time grab your dick.
Da, do, do, ru, do, do, ru do rah!
Do, do, ru, do, do, ru do rah!
Time for rumors is done.
Yes I have one more son.
And the world will be stunned.
To learn you are the one.
I'm your father!