Guys And Dolls

[NICELY-NICELY:]
What's playing at the Roxy?
I'll tell you what's playing at the Roxy.
A picture about a Minnesota man so in love with a Mississippi girl,
That he sacrifices everything, and moves all the way to Biloxi.
That's what's playing at the Roxy!

[BENNY:]
What's in the Daily News?
I'll tell you what's in the daily news.
A story about a guy who bought his wife a small ruby,
With what otherwise would have been his union dues.
That's what's in the daily news.

[NICELY-NICELY:]
What's happenin' all over?
I'll tell you what's happenin' all over.
Guys sittin' home by a television set,
Who once used to be somethin' of a Rover.
That's what's happenin' all over.

[BOTH:]
Love is the thing that has licked 'em
And it looks like Nathan's just another victim.

[NICELY-NICELY:]
Yes, sir, when you see a guy, reach for stars in the sky,
You can bet that he's doing it for some doll.

[BENNY:]
When you spot a John waiting out in the rain,
Chances are he's insane, as only a John can be for a Jane.

[NICELY-NICELY:]
When you meet a gent, paying all kinds of rent,
For a flat that could flatten the Taj Mahal

[BOTH:]
Call it sad, call it funny, but it's better than even money,
That the guy's only doing it for some doll.

[BENNY:]
When you see a Joe, saving half of his dough,
You can bet there'll be mink in it for some doll.

[NICELY-NICELY:]
When a bum buys wine like a bum can't afford,
It's a cinch that the bum is under the thumb of some little broad

[BENNY:]
When you meet a mug, lately out of the jug,
And he's still liftin' platinum, fol-de-rol

[BOTH:]
Call it hell, call it heaven,
It's a probable twelve to seven
That the guy's only doing it for some doll.

[BENNY:]
When you see a sport, and his cash has run short,
Make a bet that he's banking it with some doll.

[NICELY-NICELY:]
When a guy wears tail with the front gleaming white,
Who the hell do you think he's tiggeling pink on Saturday night.

[BENNY:]
When a lazy slob, takes a good steady job,
And he smells from Vitalis and Barbasol

[BOTH:]
Call it dumb, call it clever,
ah, but you can give odds forever,
That the guy's only doing it for some doll,
Some doll, some doll,
The guy's only doing it for some doll!