Masculinity

I want you to pick up that piece of toast like a man!
Think of this as
Masculine toast and masculine butter
Ready for spreading by a masculine hand
Pick up that knife and make believe it's a machete
It'll take all your strength and steady nerves
For hacking your way through the cherry preserves.

Think of john wayne, and jean paul belmondo
Think of the legionnaires and charlemagne's men
So like a stevedore you grab your cup
And if god forbid that your pinky pops up
You can climb back up the mountain once again.

Have you got that?
I think so!
Don't think so! You're a man!
I'm a man!
You're a man!
I'm a man!
You're a man!
I said i'm a man
Oh, albin.

About that voice of yours
Grunt like an ape, and growl like a tiger
Give us a roaring, snorting masculine laugh!
Ah ah ah ah ah ah!

Try to remember that john wayne was not soprano
Try making it rough and gruff and low
Ha ha!
Try more of john wayne and less brigitte bardodt!
Think of de gaulle and pick up rasputin
Think like you're daniel marching into the den.

While trying to join the burly brutes
If you forget that your nylons are under your boots
Georges, renaud, mme. Renaud and francis
You can climb back up the mountain once again.

Think ghengis kan (think!)
And think taras bulba (think!)
(think! Think! Think!)
Think of atilla's huns and robin hood's men
(hup! Hup!)
Try not to weaken or collapse
If they discover the petticoat under your chaps
You can climb back up the mountain once again
Woah! Yeah!