Pork Chop Song

I was in a big hotel, outside of Baltimore
They they had me handcuffed to the big turnstile
My stuffwas rusted, yes I was busted
But I knew I would prevail.

Then a big old bald headed angel
Fluttered down on feathered wings
He said now Pork Chops, is good with gravy
But you don't have to steel what you don't need.

I said I was hungry, I didn't have no money
If I cut myself I probably would not bleed
I know I was stupid, but so was that cupid
That gave me them's desires them's meats.

Then a big old bald headed angel
Ask me where I was from
I said near Tulsa, he said why don't ya'
Go back home and get a job that'd he some fun.

Well I said I had me a job, and it was a good paying job
As a cook in a cafe outside town
And we'd have the Pork Chops every night on special
And I guess that's where the wrinkle met the frown.

Then a big ol' bald headed angel
Said there's places you can go to get some help
There's Pork Chops Anonymous
And it don't cost much
Just be honest with the group, an' be yourself.

To make a long story, shorter
They let me go with a warning
If I promised to have myself
As I was leaving the jail house
This sign on anearly restaurant window
Said c'mon in we got these Pork Chops on special.

Then the big ol' bald headed angel
Said you're gonna have to quit this stuff some time
I started shakin', probably from temptation
But I was able to „just say no“ that one time
I was in a big hotel, outside of Baltimore
They had me handcuffed to the big turnstile.