Somewhere That's Green

I know Seymour's the greatest
But I'm dating a semi-sadist
So I got a black eye
and my arm's in a cast.

Still that Seymour's a cutie
Well, if not, he's got inner beauty
And I dream of a place
Where we can be together, at last.

A matchbox of our own
A fence of real chainlink
A grill out on the patio
Disposal in the sink
A washer and a dryer
And an ironing-machine
In a tract house that we share
Somewhere that's green.

He rakes and trims the grass
He loves to mow and weed
I cook like Betty Crocker
And I look like Donna Reed
There's plastic on the furniture
To keep it neat and clean
In the Pine-Sol scented air
Somewhere that's green.

Between our frozen dinner
and our bed-time nine-fifteen
We snuggle watching Lucy
On a big, enormous, twelve-inch screen.

Oh, his December bride
He's father, he knows best
The kids play Howdy-Doody
As the Sun sets in the West
A picture out of Better Homes
And Gardens magzine
Far from Skid Row
I dream we'll go
Somewhere that's Green.