The Gospel Truth (Trilogy)

Back when the world was new
The planet Earth was down on its luck
And everywhere gigantic brutes
Called Titans ran amok.

It was a nasty place
There was a mess wherever you stepped
Where chaos reigned and earthquakes
And volcanoes never slept.

And then along came Zeus
He hurled his thunderbolt
He zapped
Locked those suckers in a vault
They're trapped
And on his own stopped chaos in its tracks.

And that's the gospel truth
The guy was too type A to just relax
And that's the world's first dish
Zeus tamed the globe while still in his youth
Though, honey, it may seem impossible
That's the gospel truth.

On Mt. Olympus life was neat
And Smooth as sweet vermouth
Though, honey, it may seem impossible
That's the gospel truth.

If there's one god you don't want to get steamed up
It's Hades
'Cause he had an evil plan.

He ran the Underworld
But thought the dead were dull and uncouth
He was as mean as he was ruthless
And that's the gospel truth
He had a plan to shake things up
And that's the gospel truth.

Young Herc was mortal now
But since he did not drink the last drop
He still retained his godlike strength
So thank his lucky stars.

But Zeus and Hera wept
Because their son could never come home
They'd have to watch their precious baby
Grow up from afar.

Though Hades' horrid plan
Was hatched before Herc cut his first tooth
The boy grew stronger every day and
That's the gospel truth.