Vampire Club (Twilight Version)

Oh, the moon was full
In the color of blood
The night the Werewolves came
To the Vampire Club
A wolf named Jake tried to show off
He walked up to Bella with his shirt off
Well, he recognized a Vampire
From his school
He said something that was
Most uncool
"Hey, Pretty Boy, with the Sparkly skin!
I'm gonna steal your girl
'Cause I hate your kin!"

Fur was flying, capes were torn
Hell hath no fury like a werewolf scorn
Number one rule in this Clan
Slay the undead who invade your land
Wolves were maimed, vampires were crushed
By furry paws in a rush
Bela Lugosi orders a bud, he said
"Who let these fools in my vampire club?"

Emmet chucked a werewolf over his head
Alice saw the future and pronounced him dead
Jasper glittered all over the wall, so they
Hung him from the ceiling for a Disco Ball
There was so much angst after the fight
Edward and Bella broke up that night
While some wolves chowed down on a puddle of food
That used to be some rasta vampire dude.

Fur was flying, capes were torn
Hell hath no fury like a werewolf scorn
Number one rule in this Clan
Slay the undead who invade your land
Wolves were maimed, vampires were crushed
By furry paws in a rush
Old Max Schreck orders a Bud, and says
"Get these shmucks out of my vampire club!"

It's hard to believe after all this dreck
Ed still hasn't bit his girlfriend's neck
Though she begs and pleads and pleads and begs
Bella is still not living dead
The Cullen Clan is a peaceful bunch
On Human Blood they refuse to much
But a real vampire would have a hunch
To never fall in love with your high school lunch!

Fur was flying, capes were torn
Hell hath no fury like a werewolf scorn
Number one rule in this Clan
Slay the undead who invade your land
Wolves were maimed, vampires were crushed
By furry paws in a rush
Christopher Lee orders a Bud, and says:
"You'd better not sparkle in my Vampire Club!"