A Christmas Story

MOTHER:
Oh, look, it's snowing. Turn down the lights.

THE OLD MAN:
Oh, would you look at that.

Watch it coming down
On a Christmas night
When you see that snow
You know
That the world's all right.

MOTHER:
All the gifts unwrapped
With the house a mess
But if no one cried.

THE OLD MAN:
Or died

BOTH:
That's a small success.

Right?

This year, we nearly went insane.

THE OLD MAN:
This year, we gave up turkey for chow mein.

What a Christmas story to behold
A crazy Christmas story to be told.

MOTHER:
But with the kids tucked in bed
The frost on the tree.

THE OLD MAN:
What's to be said
When you are here next to me.

BOTH:
Who could want much more
Our Christmas story.

RALPHIE AND RANDY:
We were counting down
Down to Christmas day.

RALPHIE:
Thought I'd get a box
Of socks
That I'd throw away.

BOTH:
But the day arrived
Someone somehow knew.

RALPHIE:
Right before my eyes
Surprise
My wish came true.

MOTHER:
This year, we might not have a lot.

THE OLD MAN:
This year, I'll tell ya one thing that we've got.

BOTH:
What a Christmas story to behold
A crazy Christmas story to be told.

THE OLD MAN:
I'll take the cheap Christmas lights.

MOTHER:
The slush in the street.

THE OLD MAN:
The crowds and the lines.

BOTH:
They make the season complete.

ALL:
Who could ask for more
This Christmas story.

NARRATOR:
Back in those days, you never asked yourself 'do my parents love me?'
It never crossed your mind. You were there. They took care of you.
Their job was to raise you. Your job was to let them.
When they said 'don't run with scissors', or 'button your coat',
or 'you'll shoot your eye out', maybe even they didn't know it,
but that's what it was. Love.

ALL:
Years may pass
But still we will remember
What or where we'll be
Being here together this December
Underneath our tree.

Seeing every girl and boy
With our hearts so full of joy
We'll throw ___ some day
From far away
We'll say:

What a Christmas story to behold
A crazy Christmas story to be told.

NARRATOR:
That night, next to me in the darkness, lay my cold, blue, steel beauty.
The greatest Christmas gift I have ever received. You kiddin'?
My Old Man... My dad gave it to me. That's why it's the best gift I would ever receive.
As the excitement of the day gradually subsided,
I finally drifted off to sleep, praying of ducks on the wing and getting off spectacular hip shots.

ALL:
Christmas is here
This calm, quiet night
It comes once a year,
So you hold on to it tight

Who could want much more
A Christmas story

NARRATOR:
Good night, Ralphie. Good night, all. Thanks for listening. Merry Christmas.