Brush Up Your Shakespeare

The girls today in society
Go for classical poetry
So to win their hearts one must quote with ease
Aeschylus and Euripides
But the poet of them all
Who will start 'em simply ravin'
Is the poet people call
The bard of Stratford-on-Avon.

Brush up your Shakespeare
Start quoting him now
Brush up your Shakespeare
And the women you will wow
Just declaim a few lines from "Othella"
And they think you're a helluva fella
If your blonde won't respond when you flatter 'er
Tell her what Tony told Cleopaterer
If she fights when her clothes you are mussing
What are clothes? "Much Ado About Nussing"
Brush up your Shakespeare
And they'll all kowtow.

With the wife of the British embessida
Try a crack out of "Troilus and Cressida"
If she says she won't buy it or tike it
Make her tike it, what's more, "As You Like It"
If she says your behavior is heinous
Kick her right in the "Coriolanus"
Brush up your Shakespeare
And they'll all kowtow
And they'll all kowtow
And they'll all kowtow.