Raise the Crummhorns

Blinding sunshine shining high
Reflects on crummhorn, sword and lance
Returning home, weary from battle
To a victorious home-coming dance.

The hall is full of royal dames
Rich ladies, starved and in their bloom
We drunken, stately knights in armour
Gesture obscenely across the room.

Raise the crummhorns - Raise them high!
Raise the crummhorns - Until we die!

If later you venture up the stair
You will hear the wenches start to shriek
As the nights do shed their metal skins
Letting loose their juicy luncheon meat.

Squires and hand maidens also climb
Venturing to find an empty hall
He boats of dangers, far & wide
But she finds his sausage obscenely small.

"...and if you find yourself without a mate, do not fret, for 'tis not too late. The pig-faced cook is always fancy free, and a suckling pig she'll prepare for thee."

The celebrations we do often hold
When we return from the fields of war
We be stories to cherish until we are old
Debauchery - three and twenty score!