Miracle (Part 3)

Oh, my undercarriage doesn't feel quite normal
My skin looks just revolting in this foul, fluorescent light
And this gown is nothing like the semi-formal
Semi-Spanish gown
I should be wearing in the semi-finals tonight!

I should be dancing the Tarentella
Qui mon fella Italiano
Not dressed in hospital cotton
With an owchie front bottom
And this
Miracle!
Horrible
Miracle!
Smelly little

The most beautiful miracle I have ever seen!
I can't find his frank 'n' beans!
Ev-er-y life is unbelievably unlikely
My mummy says I'm a miracle
The chances of existence almost infinitely small
My daddy says I'm his special little guy
The most common thing in life is life
Hup, two, four, free!

And yet, every single life
Every new life
Is a miracle!
Miracle!
Miracle!

My mummy says I'm a miracle
One look at my face and it's plain to see
Ever since the day doc chopped the umbilical cord
It's been clear there's no peer for a miracle like me
My mummy says I'm a miracle
That I'm as tiny and as shiny as a mirror ball
You can be all cynical
But it's a truth empirical
There's never been a miracle, a miracle, a miracle as.. .

My mummy says I'm a lousy little worm
My daddy says I'm a bore
My mummy says I'm a jumped-up little germ
That kids like me should be against the law
My daddy says I should learn to shut my pie-hole
No one like a smart-mouthed girl like me
Mum says I'm a good case for population control
Dad says I should watch more TV.