The Miracle Of Birth

- Donna Lynne Champlin (2018)

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You are listening to the song The Miracle Of Birth by Donna Lynne Champlin, writer by Rachel Bloom;Adam Schlesinger;Jack Dolgen;Aline Brosh McKenna in album Crazy Ex-Girlfriend: Original Television Soundtrack (Season 3). The highest quality of audio that you can download is flac . Also, you can play quality at 32kbps, view lyrics and watch more videos related to this song.

Album: Crazy Ex-Girlfriend: Original Television Soundtrack (Season 3).

You Do/You Don't Want To Be Crazy - Rachel Bloom
Without Love You Can Save The World - David Hull
Scary Scary Sexy Lady - Rachel Bloom
After Everything You Made Me Do (That You Didn't Ask For) - Rachel Bloom
The Miracle Of Birth - Donna Lynne Champlin
The Buzzing From The Bathroom - Michael McMillian
I Feel Like This Isn't About Me - Bayne Gibby
I've Got My Head In The Clouds - Kabir Akhtar
Where's Rebecca Bunch? - Burl Moseley
Let's Generalize About Men - Donna Lynne Champlin
Strip Away My Conscience - Rachel Bloom
The Moment Is Me - Vella Lovell
I Go To The Zoo - Scott Michael Foster
I Go To The Zoo (Explicit) - Scott Michael Foster
Maybe She's Not Such A Heinous Bitch After All - Rachel Bloom
A Diagnosis - Rachel Bloom
This Is My Movement - Connie Jackson
First Penis I Saw - Donna Lynne Champlin
My Friend's Dad - Eddie Pepitone
My Sperm Is Healthy - Pete Gardner
My Sperm Is Healthy (Explicit) - Pete Gardner
Get Your Ass Out Of My House - Amy Hill
Fit Hot Guys Have Problems Too - David Hull
He's The New Guy - Rachel Bloom
Horny Angry Tango - Rachel Bloom
This Session Is Going To Be Different - Michael Hyatt
This Session Is Going To Be Different (Explicit) - Michael Hyatt
Face Your Fears (Reprise) - Rachel Bloom
Buttload Of Cats - Donna Lynne Champlin
Fuckton Of Cats - Donna Lynne Champlin
I'm Just A Boy In Love - Paul Welsh
Back In Action - Rachel Bloom
Nothing Is Ever Anyone's Fault - Rachel Bloom
The End Of The Movie (Adam Schlesinger Demo) - Adam Schlesinger
The Moment Is Me (Earnest Version) - Ilana Peña
Spiral (Rachel Bloom Demo) - Rachel Bloom
Settle For Her (Cut Song) - Scott Michael Foster
Horny Angry Tango (A Cappella Demo) - Jack Dolgen

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Lyrics

Of all the mystery and wonder
And beauty on this earth
Nothing can compare to
The miracle of birth
Well your cervix has been closed
And plugged with mucus
But soon that viscous plug
Will be discharged.

It's called ‘bloody show.'

And explosive diarrhea
Means that labor's drawing nearer
And those sharp painful contractions
Cause your cervix to enlarge.

Beautiful!

Then you race your ass
Over to the hospital
Where they'll strap you in
For the hell ride of your life.

It's what your body's made for.

You'll soon be in so much pain
That you'll probably exclaim
"Please just kill me now
Doctor, doula, or midwife!"

Tear, tear, tear
Goes your vagina!
Never will it be
Its cute little self again
But the good news is
If you have a few more kids
The rest will basically
Plop right out.

After hours and hours
Of utter torture
You may poop yourself and/or
Throw up as you bear down.

Cause you're a goddess!

And though you've never
Been this tired—Wait!
Here comes the ring of fire
That's your vagina bursting
Into flames as the head
Starts to crown.

Burn, burn, burn
Goes your vagina!
And you'll curse and scream
Until you hear a cry!

It's your baby!

And oops! There it went-a
That was the placenta
Which you must expel
Or you will surely die!

When it's all over they place
The baby on your breast
You may be happy for a moment
But then for months you'll be depressed
'Cause you've wrecked your life and body
You'll think "What's it really worth?"
All that for the miracle of birth!